COMIC CLOBBERS COMIC IN L.A.
New York Post
July 17, 2007 — IT was fight night at an L.A. comedy club last week when Jon Lovitz roughed up Andy Dick over the murder of their "Saturday Night Live" colleague, Phil Hartman.
Laugh Factory owner Jamie Masada, who witnessed the assault, said, "Jon picked Andy up by the head and smashed him into the bar four or five times, and blood started pouring out of his nose." Lovitz told Page Six, "All the comedians are glad I did it because this guy is a [bleep]hole."
Lovitz and Dick have been at loggerheads since a 1997 Christmas party at Hartman's house, five months before his troubled wife Brynn flipped out, fatally shooting Hartman, then killing herself. "Andy was doing cocaine, and he gave Brynn some after she had been sober for 10 years. Phil was furious about it – and then five months later he's dead," said Lovitz, adding that when he filled in on Hartman's "Newsradio" sitcom, "I told Andy, 'I wouldn't be here now if you hadn't given Brynn that cocaine.' "
Last year, Lovitz related, a drunken Dick strolled up to his table at Ago in West Hollywood, rudely downed his guests' peach liqueur drinks, and "looked at me and said, 'I put the "Phil Hartman hex" on you – you're the next one to die.' I said, 'What did you say?' and he repeated it. I wanted to punch his face in, but I don't hit women."
When the two ran into each other at the Laugh Factory last Wednesday, "I wanted him to say he was sorry for the 'Phil Hartman hex,' " Lovitz told us. "First he says, 'I don't remember saying that.' Then he leans in and says, 'You know why I said it? Because you said I killed Phil Hartman.' Which I never said. Then he asked me to be in his new movie.
"I grabbed him by the shirt and leaned him over and said, 'I don't want to be in your movie! I don't want to be in your life!' I pushed him against the rail. Then I pushed him again really hard. A security guard broke it up. I'm not proud of it . . . but he's a disgusting human being." Dick's rep said he had no comment.
Dick's weirdness has been well documented. Last year, he licked the faces of Farrah Fawcett, Carrie Fisher and Patton Oswalt, then groped and bit the hand of Post reporter Mandy Stadtmiller at a comedy-festival taping.
this is kind of old and odd news… i dont know what to think about it. To me Phil Hartman was on of the funniest people ever. And Jon Lovitz too. In my opinion, Andy Dick should of gotten more than a shove… i mean, why bring up Hartmans death as a joke? Sheesh, he is such a sleeze ball…
that reminds me of a joke.
A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and one night he's doing a show in a small town in Arkansas. With his dummy on his knee, he starts going through his usual dumb blonde jokes when a blonde in the 4th row stands on her chair and starts shouting: "I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a person's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected at work and in the community and from reaching our full potential as a person. Because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blondes, but women in general, and all in the name of humor!" The embarrassed ventriloquist begins to apologize, and the blonde yells, "You stay out of this, mister! I'm talking to that little shit on your knee."
bu dum bum.
from now on you can consider yourself my lawyer and representative on this board.
I am nothing if not linguistically talented.
If you really want my take on this, in more than nine words (including one use of profanity! I was on a roll!), Andy Dick has been known to live up to his unfortunate last name. His relationships with drugs, specifically cocaine, have gotten him into much trouble in the past. However, one must not forget that there are plenty of Dicks in Hollywood, and not just there, but plenty of Dicks in the world. This really is a celebrity squabble and the real target should be providing help to institutions like Narcotics Anonymous or help-lines so that tragedy—like what happened to the very talented Late Phil Hartman—can hopefully be avoided in the future.
In our local playhouse (yes, my town has a local playhouse) we have a poster signed by Carrot Top.
I'm not sure why it's displayed because I don't think it's something to be particularly proud of.
Though! Bob Weir (of the Grateful Dead) did come through and play. I just sat outside with my friends and talked to all the Deadheads (there were many) camped out on the hill. I had never had so many offers for shrooms in my entire life. Many a man told me I could probably get in for free if I had flashed a certain couple of things (a few of my friends happened to be told this same fact a few more times than I because their certain couple of things were larger than my certain couple of things). I was also asked by a very tripped-out old hippie to choose between a number of posters of various 60s bands [the Who, the Beatles, etc.]. I chose Led Zeppelin. His reply: "the pretty ones always choose Zeppelin." I was actually touched until he offered me a back massage, which I politely declined. He had a third eye headband and was named Carl.
My friend also delivered Chinese food to Bob Weir. Weir didn't tip.
And so ends "what the fuck was that?" story time
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